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Steve Schwarzman’s Roast, in Its Entirety

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Steve Schwarzman’s Roast, in Its EntiretyHighlights from a speech given by Stephen A. Schwarzman, the Blackstone Group co-founder, at the Alfred E. Smith Memorial Foundation Dinner. In the roast, which was widely circulated on Wall Street, Mr. Schwarzman lampooned, among others, Rupert Murdoch, Brian T. Moynihan and himself.

“It’s such an honor to break bread with all of you tonight,” Mr. Schwarzman said, in one of the lines not included in last week’s highlight reel. “Normally, I’d prefer to raise a fund, identify the bread as undervalued, buy the bread, take it private, then break it.”

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